Tuesday, December 30, 2008

Accidental New Years date

Happy New Year to everyone....I'm sitting here trying to think of some outstanding accomplishments for 2008 and what I can boils down to is I spent the year pushing my comfort zones ........Belly Dance performances and I pushed myself to go on more dates...I must say non of the dates moved past the 1st date.....in most cases my decision not to pursue it due to lack of chemistry......(although I had a date about 2 weeks ago with a man that I would consider going on another date with). Now onto my accidental New Years date..........I recently began to chat with a guy (online dating site) through emails and it quickly ended up in a phone call last night (I had to call quickly before I chicken out) anyway when we were hanging up he asked if I would be interested in getting together for a drink.....and asked if I was free on Wed. (he thought Thursday was New Years Eve) when I told him that it was NYE he asked if I wanted to go with him to his friends home who is throwing a party.....I declined.....I've never met him and it may turn out to be One drink and got to Run date. After so many disappointing 1st dates I think the best 1st date would be to pass each other on a street corner and if you like what you see you could plan a real date. I guess I'm tainted from too many disappointing dates. I will have to let you know how it goes tomorrow night....wish me luck.

Sunday, December 28, 2008

8 more vacation days

I can't believe how much TV I can watch in one day....I still haven't had much motivation (too much emotion spent worrying about possible lay offs at work). I have been watching marathons of NCIS, Big Break X Michigan and today I watched Highway 18 (who would have guessed I would enjoy watching Golf reality competitions shows when I never played a round of golf). Every day I have gotten some things accomplished around my apartment hopefully over the next 8 days I will get myself out of the Blues that I'm been experiencing and get motivated to do more!
I have spent a great deal of time finding new blogs to read.....there are so many interesting journals it is endless.....a few of the weight loss journals had reviews of Marylou Retton's scale designed to help you lose weight in 10 lb increments.....well I bought one for a chrismas present to myself.......well I wish I hadn't.....with my new approach to dieting based on 2 books"Intuitive Eating" "The Rules of Normal Eating". Basically it boils down to getting back in touch with your body and waiting to eat until you are trully hunger and Stopping when you begin to fill full.....no foods are off limits (with time this helps rid your self of binges that occur when you deny yourselves from "forbidden foods". What is surprising is just how fast you really get full ...... and it takes a lot of self control to stop eating at the point of being ful when the food you are eating tastes so good. Anyway getting back to my not liking the Marylou Retton scale is that Intutive Eating is more effective if you don't weigh yourself...you know how water weight and other bodily funtions effect your weight and if the scale says the wrong number it ruins your day and your efforts to be a normal eater.....having formally been an anorexic it would be nice to be a normal eater (not dieting all the time or constantly feeling bad about food) and just get to my natural body weight. Sorry not a very upbeat entry.

Well that is all for now....Diane

Saturday, December 20, 2008

Call me a slug

I can't get going today......I had to go to the barn this am because 2 guys there had offered to help me move my months worth of hay that was delivered yesterday and the guys that delivered it stacked the 20 bales so high about 2 times my height, it looked like Mount Everest...it was so ridiculous! Thankfully they felt sorry for me ..... the thing was I needed to be there 1st thing in the morning....well I only got about 2-3 hours of sleep.....moving and rearranging my portion of the feed room required about 2 hours....I can feel it in my lower back. a 2 hour nap hasn't helped much ....hopefully I will get a second wind later this evening....I'm a night owl. I still haven't decided if I'm going to put up my small christmas tree....whew time is running out. Diane

Thursday, December 18, 2008

Is it Friday?

Well the count down is on......I get off at noon tomorrow and I will be on vacation for over 2 weeks...(this year this is really important.....less time to screw up at work while they are making make or break decision on who gets to remain....please oh please pick me : )

I thinking about actually putting up my Christmas tree ( I love and collect ornaments and love the little white lights all lite up with all the lights in the house turned off)...I will keep you informed.

Off to work...Diane

Saturday, December 13, 2008

I Made it through another week


Another week down.....2 weeks since the news of 40% lay off of my dept.
*Depression has hit
*I haven't gone to a single belly dancing class or Nia class in 2 weeks
*On the weekends sleeping about 12 hours (surprised my dog Teddy is agreeable to that much sleep)
*Going to bed early during the week
*I guess I'm getting down to the basics so My focus is on doing the best job I can ...... I certainly don't want a major screw up at work .....when they are deciding who gets to remain
*Ordered books on choosing the right career (just in case)
*Holding off on writing a resume and ordering how to write a good resume and how to interview (don't want to put bad mojo out in the universe)
*Don't think I'm putting up a Christmas tree up this year (I love christmas trees and collect ornaments)
*A guy from Match that we had been exchanging emails and a few calls.....was suppose to call and let me know when a good time to meet over coffee has disappeared.....the old something better came along on Match.....no response is a response.
*There is a little bit of hope another man on Match is emailing....he is a little older than I would normally go for but he seems like a grounded person and didn't run when I let him know about the possible lay offs....I think his company is going through the same thing
*Visit to the Oncologist yesterday let me know that my Iron level in my blood is remains high but not at the point that we would need to take action...go back in a year....if I have medical insurance
*Love watching sappy Christmas movies ..... must have a happy ending
*If I'm blessed with keeping my job I have gotten a wake up call...I will be spending less and saving more and down sizing my belongings in case I have to move

Sunday, December 7, 2008


Well, I haven't felt much like journaling, Monday an announcement was made at work that my 40% of the dept.I work for was going to 40% of the work force laid off (I don't know how they are going to restructure...... our entire group could be hit or a move to another state could be required, I won't know who is impacted until mid January....at the end of the teleconference that last thing said was "Have a Merry Christmas, go shopping"... I couldn't believe how insensitive that statement was......it would have been more appropriate to say Christmas is cancelled! So I have been very depressed, scared to say the least.....fears of being homeless are all I can think about....it's not like job opportunities are bountiful! Prayers are appreciated!


Sunday, November 30, 2008

My vacation is over : (

Well just a few more hours till I hit the bed and my vacation is over...I didn't accomplish all that I wanted to but I did more than I thought I would....main thing my apartment is beginning to shape up.....I see the light at the end of the tunnel....I have way too many clothes and books....maybe over Christmas vacation I can focus on those 2 areas....I have to be happy with microsteps and not get overwhelmed and do nothing! Eventually if I ever get married I will need an organizer and a maid to come in periodically......I'm just no good at either organizing or cleaning. I need to spend more time at home.......18 months of going to classes almost on a daily basis really took my apt to hell in a handbag!
I uploaded a picture to Match.com) that my Step Mother took on Thanksgiving..... I hoping that it may help and peak someone interest......One man did respond to my wink and we have exchanged several emails....he was at the airport about to depart and said he will write more when he reaches the UK ....keep your fingers crossed....it would be so nice to be dating someone during the holiday trifecta (<- I know I didn't spell it right) Christmas, New Years and Valentines Day.....Last year the Man I was dating broke up with me on Christmas.....he and his Ex wife decided things weren't over with them... I was just collaratel damage!


Friday, November 28, 2008

Hi all and a belated Happy Thanksgiving....this chickaroo did not wake up at dawn and hit the stores....I was all snuggled up in bed.....I actually slept over 11 hours......over the last week that I have been on vacation that is the way it has been ....I stay up until about 1:30 am and then sleep to about 12:00ish....I'm just going with it, evidently my body needs it (or I'm more depressed than I realized)...soon enough it will be back to getting an average of 6 hours of sleep so I'm going to enjoy it while I can. My Thanksgiving was enjoyable...I made homemade yummy Mac and cheese, corn casserole, buttermilk pie and iced brownies. My Mom's side of the family gathered at my sisters home....I stuck to my Intuitive diet concept and ate what I wanted and stopped when I felt full ....I can't believe how quickly I really start to feel full and in the past when the food was yummy I would just keep eating....I'm retraining myself to listen to my body and assure myself that I can eat later when I feel hungry again....(the one element that I haven't done very well at is getting more exercise for the pleasure of it ......I've been in the dumps lately and I'm doing good to go to the 3 days of belly dancing a week....I guess I need to kick myself in the rear and just do it. I ended the evening by dropping by my Dad's house, to see him and my step Mom (she had recent back surgery) we took them both big plates of food for them to enjoy. I think they were happy that my sister, my oldest daughter and I came by...I normally don't see them on Thanksgiving so it was nice to do a drive by for a quick group hug.
I do think I will venture out to JoAnn's there was a quilting book that I fell in love with on Tuesday and I have a 40% off coupon that I can use starting today...I will save 8 dollars... I'm getting the quilting bug again....it has been years since I was passionate about it......I do know that I need to add something creative back into my life as an outlet....I think I will be a happier person.....over the last 14 months my focus has really only been on work and belly dancing ...I have decided I need more balance in my life....adding quilting back into my life and joining the local Quilt guild would be a start....I also need to push myself to get back to an Illustrated Discovery Journal..... you wouldn't believe the stack of magazines that I have that I could put to good use.... more later.. diane

Monday, November 24, 2008

Things I've done

I snagged this little meme from Life as a Navy Wife's journal. Join in... Super simple... You just highlight the things you've done in your life. Mine are in Red.
1. Started your own blog
2. Slept under the stars
3. Played in a band
4. Visited Hawaii
5. Watched a meteor shower
6. Given more than you can afford to charity
7. Been to Disneyland/world
8. Climbed a mountain
9. Held a praying mantis
10. Sang a solo
11. Bungee jumped
12. Visited Paris
13. Watched a lightning storm at sea (from the beach)
14. Taught yourself an art from scratch (Quilting)
15. Adopted a child
16. Had food poisoning
17. Walked to the top of the Statue of Liberty
18. Grown your own vegetables
19. Seen the Mona Lisa in France
20. Slept on an overnight train
21. Had a pillow fight
22. Hitch hiked
23. Taken a sick day when you’re not illl (a wellness day)
24. Built a snow fort (a snowman)
25. Held a lamb
26. Gone skinny dipping
27. Run a Marathon (No but completed the Hotter than Hell bike race)
28. Ridden in a gondola in Venice
29. Seen a total eclipse
30. Watched a sunrise or sunset
31. Hit a home run
32. Been on a cruise
33. Seen Niagara Falls in person
34. Visited the birthplace of your ancestors
35. Seen an Amish community
36. Taught yourself a new language
37. Had enough money to be truly satisfied
38. Seen the Leaning Tower of Pisa in person
39. Gone rock climbing
40. Seen Michelangelo’s David
41. Sung karaoke
42. Seen Old Faithful geyser erupt
43. Bought a stranger a meal at a restaurant
44. Visited Africa
45. Walked on a beach by moonlight
46. Been transported in an ambulance
47. Had your portrait painted
48. Gone deep sea fishing
49. Seen the Sistine Chapel in person
50. Been to the top of the Eiffel Tower in Paris
51. Gone scuba diving or snorkeling
52. Kissed in the rain
53. Played in the mud
54. Gone to a drive-in theater
55. Been in a movie
56. Visited the Great Wall of China
57. Started a business
58. Taken a martial arts class
59. Visited Russia
60. Served at a soup kitchen
61. Sold Girl Scout Cookies (Camp Fire Girls Candy back when it was Camp Fire Girls)
62. Gone whale watching
63. Got flowers for no reason
64. Donated blood, platelets or plasma
65. Gone sky diving
66. Visited a Nazi Concentration Camp
67. Bounced a check
68. Flown in a helicopter (Flown in a Blimp)
69. Saved a favorite childhood toy (searched for my Favorite doll Kitten by Madame Alexander on eBay and finally found her Hooty Hoo)
70. Visited the Lincoln Memorial
71. Eaten Caviar
72. Pieced a quilt
73. Stood in Times Square
74. Toured the Everglades
75. Been fired from a job
76. Seen the Changing of the Guards in London
77. Broken a bone
78. Been on a speeding motorcycle
79. Seen the Grand Canyon in person
80. Published a book
81. Visited the Vatican
82. Bought a brand new car
83. Walked in Jerusalem
84. Had your picture in the newspaper (Drill Team officer in High School and when I was an Apache Belle in College)
85. Read the entire Bible
86. Visited the White House (just out front)
87. Killed and prepared an animal for eating
88. Had chickenpox
89. Saved someone’s life
90. Sat on a jury
91. Met someone famous (John Denver when I performed at the Super Bowl as an Apache Belle)
92. Joined a book club
93. Lost a loved one
94. Had a baby
95. Seen the Alamo in person
96. Swam in the Great Salt Lake
97. Been involved in a law suit
98. Owned a cell phone
99. Been stung by a bee

Sunday, November 23, 2008

My weekend

Well, I'm on vacation but it doesn't seem like a vacation yet.....hopefully it will set it and I will relax. I went to a C &W dancing establishment two nights in a row hoping to run back into a guy that I met last weekend... and I kind of blew him off because he was coming on a little too much...kind of desperate...after thinking about it I decided that I didn't give him a fair chance and thought that I might run into him again....NOT....I guess it wasn't meant to be... On Friday night a guy walk right up to me and said my name, I had no clue who he was....turns out he was a guy I went out once in Feb. (eHarmony date) it didn't take me very long to remember .....when he repeatedly stuck out his tongue and it was Pointed ...yuck a pointed tongue....keep it in your mouth please....for everyones sake!
My Mom had a birthday (she is 76 ...very hard to believe) on Thursday so it was time to have a birthday lunch to celebrate.....great Mexican food and good company (My Mom and Aunt Pat).
I've taken myself off Mirapex and feeling the effects daily. All the horrible symptoms I had 2 years ago..... horrible feelings in my arms and legs ....right now I can barely type because my arms feel like there are tight bands around them.... I may have to try a different med but so afraid of the weight gain.....
Next performance is scheduled for December 6th Holiday at the Hall celebration....dancing on the main stage ..... hopefully I will get the choreography down and can dance a 2nd dance.
Happy Holidays....I need to journal all the things that I have to be very Thankful for....it is so easy to take things in your life for granted. diane

Saturday, November 15, 2008

Crown Violet Performance

Hi all,

I'm about to get ready for a Crown Violet performance at Barnes and Noble, I don't really know what to expect...I do know the floor space is going to be a challenge....what will the customers think.....it should be interesting....I will let you know! I'm planning to wear the same outfit that is included in the previous entry but I'm going to wear a different wig.....at least I think I am...I better get to it so I can figure it out....pictures to follow #: ) diane

Saturday, November 8, 2008

Wow 6 followers ...Exiting

I'm thrilled that anyone is interested in following the daily going ons of my life.....I will try to be more faithful in my journal entries. Crown Violet had it performance this afternoon. I changed up my tribal custom hoping not to look as big as a house......I think I looked a little better today than last week but it will just come down to losing weight....I did some research on Mirapex which I have been taking for about a year and a half...unknown to me it can cause large weight gain (I have been hungry non stop ....who would have thought it was Mirapex....and one of the other side effects is compulsive buying on ebay etc. .... that explains the urge to buy nearly 30 wigs and about 12 silk veils...... I'm glad I found out about it before I spent more $ and gained more weight......I've been off it for 2 days and my arms and legs are feeling odd again......a heaviness......I'm so vein that I would rather look good than feel good....I don't think it matters how old you get a gal wants to be desirable....especially when you are hoping to find a great guy to date at least more than one date....I'm rambling so I will end my whining. diane

So exciting 6 followers!

Friday, November 7, 2008


Hi All....I'm so happy to have 4 followers....so cool! I have taken today as a vacation day, Crown Violet Belly dancing troupe has a performance tomorrow and there are some things that I didn't want to worry about having time to do so thus the day off.....i was very tired last night and welcomed the sleep in this am. I'm about to head off to Nia dance class and then my errands begin. Oh by the way "Ice Pony" I love your journaling about horseback riding....I must admit I haven't been focused on riding my Gracie over the last year but reading your blog the riding bug may hit me!

More later .....Diane

Sunday, October 26, 2008

Sorry it's been so long

Hi to my 2 followers from my aol journal .....I'm so happy to see you followed me over here. I sure would like to follow your journals because I'm sure you have moved them since the end of Oct is looming. This past month has been full of change and my head is still twirling a bit and my mood and body don't do well with a lot of change at one time. One good thing that has happen in the last few weeks is that I have reconnected with my friends at Blue Anjou and I'm taking 3 -5 classes a week....it sure seems longer than 6 months since I've been there but everyone are just the same loving community they were months ago, they have welcomed me with open arms....I'm so blessed! I have also started a Hula class, I wasn't sure I wanted to make the 40 mile round trip for the class but I really like the dance and it used different muscle and I'm sure it will help my hand movements in belly dancing. Nothing happening on the dating scene this month....I had a date a few weeks ago that looked nothing like his photo on match.....the pictures must have been 10 years old.....I didn't recognize him when he spoke to me....no love connection there. I was talking to the wonderful owner of Blue Anjou and I was telling her how I felt that maybe I had used up all my love cards for this lifetime, she told me to rethink it and tell myself that I have saved the best Love Card for now! I like that and I'm trying to convince my mind of it!

Saturday, October 11, 2008


It's amazing just how quite it is......I usually have the TV as company or Teddy is barking trying to get my attention.....right now silence expect for the sound of my keyboard typing..... *: ) d

Can't sleep & : (

Well, I can't sleep and thought what better time than to play around with the gadget on this new blog service....really fun features. Come check it out! Long day today at the dance studio, approximately 7 hours worth....too much for a Saturday! d

Sunday, October 5, 2008

New Journal Lucky Begonia's Dashboard Confessional

Hi all, I've started another blog a few months ago because I liked the name Lucky begonias dashboard confessional....anyway it is coming in handy since this journal will disapper in less than 26 days. Please come visit, I don't have many readers on this blog but the ones I have I would like to keep in touch with! Diane


So sad that AOL journals are going cease to exist....all those years of entries will disappear unless I can figure how to transfer them to another on-line journal...hey all you aol journal writers what do you plan to do? Well it has been forever since my last posting. I survived Yaa Halla Ya'll, my 2 performance their, the photo shoot, I tested out and was able to move up a level of belly dance (boy what a difference a level makes......I'm still in shock "Were not in Kansas anymore...Toto"

I've recently joined facebook, I'm still trying to figure out the in's and the out's of it.

Monday, August 4, 2008

I need a map or a secretary!

I think I  need a map or a secretary to clue me in on which way I'm going...I don't think I have been this busy in ages! To top it off I think the heat is bring back some of my awful symptoms for a year ago....scary! I have Bellydancing practices every night/day except Sunday's to preparing for my 2 performances in less than 2 weeks....I'm running in and running right out...my apartment looks like a tornado hit it!
Panda Cam update...no cub yet and from the looks of it, it is probably a false pregnancy...how disappointing ...all that pain and suffering and no beautiful baby at the end of it!
p.s. yesterday...lunch and a movie with my Mom, Aunt Pat, Sister Mindy and my Nephew Spencer...everyone then went to the movies to see Moma Mia (everyone by Spence....you know no guy wants to see a Chick flick with a bunch of old hens....LOL!
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Saturday, July 26, 2008

Friday, July 25, 2008

You asked for Pictures ....well you got them

Pictures....you wanted belly dancing pictures so I uploade my Daughter Jennifer at her Belly Dancing graduation.....isn't she beautiful.....she there was a reason I bought all that belly dancing stuff over the last year...yeah validation!  Diane

Wednesday, July 23, 2008

nap time

Do you ever get hope from work and just want to go to sleep....that is the beauty of living alone your time is your time.....I haven't been sleeping well the last 3 nights...my Yorkie Teddy (she has early stages of Kidney disease) keeps waking me up through out the night, sometimes she is hungry sometimes she needs to go outside....anyway the result is not much uninterrupted sleep......tonight I worked late so I missed my turbo bellydancing class (I wasn't going to spend 4 dollars of gas to workout for less than half an hour) so I opted to take a 2 1/2 hour nap, when I laid down I really didn't think I would fall asleep....can you say dead to the world! So all I can tell you is that I'm losing ground this week on shaping up before Yaa Halla Ya'll! One dress rehearsal and class photo down 2 to go....tomorrow I have a private lesson for 2 of the dances that I have to test out on to go qualify to move up to the next level...directly after the private lesson it will be time for the 2nd dress rehearsal and class photo...I'm wearing a different costume and wig in each photo....why look the same in 3 photos in the same year book...keep um guessing or thinking your Crazy! night Diane

Sunday, July 20, 2008

More changes to the outfit, will the maddness ever stop!

Happy Sunday to all....Wow what 11 hours of sleep will do for you! I love to sleep in when I have no pressing to do's or to be's. It seems Sundays are the only day that is possible. Belly Dancing is pretty much that main componet of my life this days of course minus work which pays for the pleasure. I really enjoy every aspect of it, the challenge in moving up to the next level, the friends I have met, performing and of course all the great, beautiful, feminine, noisy pieces to a Belly Dancing costume. I'm still losing weight so I'm not really ready to alter the expensive beaded bra and belt set that I bought early in the year.....but it is so fun pulling together the perfect costume, my 2 for August continue to evolve...the skirt I'm wearing is a black chiffon that flows really well, I currently have a pair of harem pants that are black cotton....I bought some black eyelet fabric to make harem pants but I'm considering to buy some black chiffon ....even though  they are shear I will have a shawl wrapped around my skirt plus a shimmy belt so my essential have no chance of being seen....plus I will have of course have "unders" on......I think the Chiffon harem pants will be the perfect choice, I wonder chiffon is hard to sew....anyone Know?  Saturday I bought a black shawl with gold pastelletes hanging all over it.....the shimmy belt will go on top of it......I think the shawls will add a nice layered effect! I don't know if you remember that I bought a portable DVD player....I'm finally using it .....currently I'm watching the 1st season of the Gilmore Girls....I love the little "Dialogue Zingers" that all through out show.  bye for now Diane

Friday, July 18, 2008

Presto Chango

Everyday it seems I'm making changes to the 2 belly dancing costumes for the big performance in August, I was at the Belly Dancing studio late last night...classes are lasting longer in preparation and then I shopped for about 45 minutes trying everything on...so far within the last 7 days I have bought 2 shimmy belts, a longer accent scarf with fringe and a veil. On Saturday I want to get another accent scarf for the 2nd outfit.

I'm getting excited.....Rachel Brice, Zoe Jakes, Aziza, Artimis, Fathem ......etc.will be here and I will be taking their workshops and seeing them perform live....way cool!

Bye for now.....Diane

Tuesday, July 15, 2008

Belly Dancing show update

Well time is moving fast the Big show is less than 5 weeks away, in my Monday class we are already having a dress rehersal on the 21st ......I will have to spend some time finishing of the bra portion of the outfit, I'm doing 2 dances and I think I will change out the bra, arm sleeves, shimmy belt and jewelry (one outfit will black-pink accents, silver jewely and the 2nd one black/gold accents and gold jewelry. It's going to be Exciting....I don't know exactly what I'm going to wear for the photo session probably the black and gold and the fuscia silk veil.....

No Way

Guess, the guy I had a date with on the 4th of July....at the end of the date I had the feeling that there wasn't going to be a next date......day in day out no contact, no emails.....then on the 9th day a surprise email from him....he had a great time and wants to plan a 2nd date....if it really occurrs.it will probably be in a few weeks because he has his 2 daughters for 2 weeks beginning tomorrow....it was just nice to know that maybe I'm not such a loser as I was beginning to believe.


National Baby Watch ....Baby Panda that is!

Did you know that the National Zoo in Washington DC have 2 cams where you can watch the daily lifes for the Panda at the zoo. The Momma Panda maybe about to have a baby.......they aren't exactly sure if she really is with baby....Pandas can have pseudo pregnacies......so it is just wait and see.....check it out.....wouldn't be cool to witness the first days of a baby pandas life especially since they are endangered. Got to love something so Big, Roundy and Cuddly.


Friday, July 11, 2008

Friday....Happy Friday

It's Friday .....happy days are here again...for a short work week it sure has seemed long.....after being off for 6 days the reentry can be hard. Well tomorrow I have 2 bellydancing classes and in the turbo bellydancing it is weigh in day ....yuck....I think I'm going to have to start focusing on just adding more exercise to my week and less focus on the food aspect...the minute I'm on a diet I'm hunger all day long....

Well our big Belly Dancing performance is about 5 weeks away....I can dance 3 different dance because I go to 3 different advanced one classes.....the Thursday night class' dance is hard....it is a choreography that I know but it has zills added to it.....you ask me dance and play zills...my brain hasn't caught on yet....there is also a Wed mid day class....I love the dance they are doing.....I'm thinking about taking some vacation time and attending maybe their class the last 3 weeks if I can perform their dance....I needed to talk to Isis and get her blessing.....the class members may not like it but hey they will get over it! Besides one of the requirements is that I have to perform it to move up to the next level.....hopefully I will be prepared to test out of 3 of the required 4 dance test outs after Yaa Halla Ya'll in Sept....that is my goal.....I need to get off my kester and practice at home.....the problem is I live in a small apt with a very, tiny living area....it is the only area that I can dance in....oh well I just need to do it ...later Diane

Wednesday, July 9, 2008

May have to count sheep

Couldn't sleep Monday night....maybe 2 1/2 hours and last night maybe 4 1/2 hours...it is no wonder that on the weekends when I'm sleeping good I can sleep up to 13 hours...they say you can't make up sleep but i don't agree! Tonight is Turbo Belly Dancing....on Saturday's weigh in I had lost about 6 lbs in 4 weeks....I've lost ground over the last few days....depressing getting on the scales when it is going in the wrong direction....I'm trying not to get bummed....hopefully it is water weight!

Tuesday, July 8, 2008

Another one bites the dust

Well I did end up having a date on July 4th, this time I really enjoyed myself but know by the end of the evening that I would never hear from him again.....and I was right. My 1st hint was when he asked "Do you have to go to the stables everyday" followed by "Well how long does it take you" then the finale statement when he had some idea how much $ it takes a month to own a horse he said something like he couldn't support that or he couldn't buy into that......the way I took his statement was that if we ended up together it wouldn't be acceptable for that much on my income to go towards a horse.....if he felt that way he sure wouldn't like the $ I spend for Belly Dancing classes.... costumes... wigs... BellyDancing instructional DVD's etc..... and the fact that I still help my daughter out with $.......I guess it is better to know it isn't going any where early on but I really think he was putting the cart before the HORSE in this case LOL! Like I thought I'm the Queen of 1st dates.......no Love Bug in my Future......I guess I have a Huge L on my forehead for being the Biggest Loser on the dating scene! Diane


Friday, July 4, 2008

There is hope for a date tonight

Happy 4th to everyone, I have  no special plans for today, the only  plans other than Belly dancing classes is going out to lunch on Sunday with my Mom, Aunt and Sister. Well much to  my surprise a guy that I had winked at on Match actually called last night, we talked for over an hour....well he is playing golf this afternoon but we may get together for a drink tonight....that would be really cool....it would be nice to get my mind occupied with something positive.....I have been focusing my thoughts on 3 years ago....that was when Brett unceremoniously ended our 3 1/2 year relationship in the cruelest of all the break up's that I have live through. I keep telling myself that I should be over the anger/hurt but for some reason it is there.Maybe expressing it here will help me move through those negative feelings.......you know it isn't the fact that he didn't want to be with me anymore it is how COLD he was....almost unhuman like that cut me to the quick.....he must have really hated me is all I can think. to be so, so ugly. I have to weigh in tomorrow at my Turbo bellydancing class....bummer I don't think I have lost anything....my plan was to only eat poptarts and drink slimfast today in hopes that the water I'm retaining would depart before 10:00 tomorrow....if I go out for drinks that kind of blows that plan....but I have to be flexible and not get rigid like I was back in my aneroxic days when I would only eat certain foods and not have any social life that would take me into eating situations...i.e. eating out.   Diane

Thursday, July 3, 2008

The joy of Wigs

Hi all....well I have to tell you that I'm sitting here in another wonderful wig.....a stylish Platinum white, long page boy cut wig...I really haven't worn it out in public but I'm going to venture out to do some shopping....it is definitely a eye grabber and you have to be in the just the right mood or should I say attitude to wear it....I will have to let you know how it goes! This is my 2nd day of vacation and I had all these plans for things I wanted to get to during this time off....it seems I only have enough energy to go to Belly dancing classes and the stables daily and then I'm tapped....sickly tired....I'm hoping whatever was wrong with me last year isn't reappearing it's ugly head....never could determine the root cause....I'm not sure if Hemochromotosis can cause extereme exhaustion.....I should be happy I have the energy to take 5 Belly dancing classes a week...it was so much worse not that long ago when I could barely walk up the flight of stairs to get to my apt. I guess I have to be happy with where I'm at and accept living in a messy abode. Maybe it a good thing I don't have a man in my life ......my apt would be embarrassing....my daughters are good about understanding, Thank God for my wonderful daughters! d

Wednesday, July 2, 2008

Vacation has begun

Well Freida I'm changing my font for you.....I hate that you had trouble reading my entries, but happy that you went to so much trouble messing with the font so you could read......I really appreciate you reading my journal and leaving me comments....how is your garden looking.....can you send me your link again to your journal ....maybe you can post some photos of your summer garden?  Well no dates in the past week and hardly any interest from the fellows on the dating site.....I keep praying that God will bless me with a wonderful Man to at least date and share some time with soon......I guess finding a Man that will appreciate  me and all my quirkiness....Belly Dancing...Wigs of many colors....oh well life with me wouldn't be dull. I'm going to attempt to add a picture of  me in my Platinum Blonde wig!

Sunday, June 29, 2008

Is anyone one out there.....Hello

I think I'm the only one that reads my journal....is there anyone else out there .....Hello....I would love some comments.................
I went to a Bellydancing Hafla  last night,,,I wore  my Platinum Blonde asymmetrical cut wig and everyone seemed to love it......the dancers were wonderful .....maybe someday soon I will have the guts to get up there and dance in front of a crowd.....it will be my goal within the next year to do it....I didn't realize that I was so tired....I slept for 13...count them 13 hours.....when I woke up I found out that Gracie's stall had flooded last night.....I've been at the barn for about 4 hours, thank Goodness 2 friends took pity on me and pitched in to strip her stall, get the standing water out ......in about 100 degree plus high humidity.....boy I have calories in the bank.....What's for dinnner....yummy.   I have enrolled in a Turbo Belly Dancing class called "Fit or Bust" we are supposed to be writing down everything that touches our month..count calories.....I was an Anorexic and tend to go overboard when I focus on calories....I tired it for a week and have decided to do what is best for me and just track whether I only eat when I'm hungry and stop as soon as I feel full......I don't want to classify foods as good foods and bad foods ....I want a way to manage my weight for a life time. We were supposed to turn in our sheets for the last 3 weeks and I just handed in my daily exercise tracking sheet. My instructor didn't get on my case which I was happy about....I have lost between 3-4 lbs in three weeks. I have started to weigh myself which I can get over zealous...but so far so good.

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Bevy of Bellydancers

It's been forever since I've dropped a line...more oof the same ....first dates that are either nice but no spark or just straight out NO WAY!  My Mom says I need to write a book on all my online dating sites 1st dates.....maybe....who knows....
My daughter Jennifer graduates from the 1st level of belly dancing tomorrow night....I'm so proud and then Robin will graduate the end of September.....In my family we are going to be a Bevy of Bellydancers!

Sunday, May 25, 2008

Wigs, wigs a beautiful thing!

Hi all,
How is your long weekend going? Mine is very laid back, my only plans have been belly dancing lessons and I'm going to Scarborough Faire tomorrow which is closing day and is usually a little crazier than a normal day. I've gone about 7 times already, two times I was an ambassador for my Belly Dancing Studio which was very fun. I've gotten into this Ren thing which I would have bet against in the beginning. Each visit has been more fun than the previous one.

Oh by the way, during my first time down to Scarborough Faire I realized that short spiky salt and pepper hair doesn't play well as a belly dancer! The other dancers can buy those clip on pony tails etc So I decided that wigs was my solution! Ive gone wig wild and have discovered that I look pretty good as a blond and a red head especially a platinum blond....I've been missing out all these years....I won't be changing my hair color but it fun to have a different hair color and style every day
I feel like the Barbie doll that came with 3 different wigs, I love it!

Sunday, March 30, 2008

Belly Dancing Graduation celebration

Hi all,
I can't honestly tell you when I made the last entry.....Hi Winifred....sorry I haven't been timely in my updates.
I graduated from the intermediate beginners level, I will now move on to the Advanced 1...the graduation was something else I will actually have another graduation tomorrow night, my daughters will be attending...I hope I do well. We were all prepared to do our dance, which was first on the program...what we didn't know we would also be doing an impromptu veil then a dance impromptu

then we were called up to do a short solo....OMG ...I thought I would die.....I pulled it off, tomorrow night at least I will know what to expect.
I'd like to ask for everyone's prayers, my Mother is ill, I went to see her today and she doesn't look well at all... I tried to talk to her about things to look forward to once she gets well....I'm going to make more time to connecting with my family and friends.
FYI ...I've had 3 1st dates this month....no love connection....my time will come.

Sunday, January 27, 2008

Bounce, Bounce...i hate being dumped

Hi all,
A first happened yesterday.....I had performed in my 1st Belly dancing performance as a member of a new troupe "Crown Violet". Both my Father and Step Mother came to support me and Both of my daughters and their boyfriends also came to my debut! I don't know if it was a great performance but I have one under my belt now....and I can tell you that there are more to come...how strange to find something you love doing when your almost 49! Look out 50 who knows what I will be up to then. Oh by the way

Oh by the way I have also taken up drumming classes at the Belly Dancing studio...hand drumming a doumbek used to play middle eastern music that belly dancers dance to ......I bought the most beautiful drum,,,inlaid mother of pearl and the design has a sultan and about 3 belly dancers on it....how perfect for me! An update all the time I was posting over the last 5 months I was dating a guy Oct through Dec.....I didn't want to write about it and jinx it....well it didn't make a difference....he broke up
up with me on Christmas and went back to his exwife....What a horrible Christmas gift..I'm still crying over it on a daily basis.I keep hoping time will that the memories and the hurt and loss away...after all the failed relationships you would think I would be better at handling them but the hurt just compounds with each new one! I haven't given up on finding Love! d